Flatulence

In layman terms its fart. For some awkward reason I find that farts have a lot in common with relationships. 

Relationships

Farts

You no understand even after I give visual aid?

Okay, let me bring you down to the fundamentals. There are three types of farts and relationships, so to speak. 

1) The Loud and Proud 

In relationships we have those couples which start off with a bang, smooch all over the place and publicize their relationships all over Facebook. However, these relationships usually end within a 2 week period after either the boy or girl's mother finds out about their 'true love' and bans them from seeing each other again - Indian Movie Style. Fart-wise, this particular type is infamous for being the 'short one' and the 'easily forgettable' one. See the similarities?

2) The Silent but Violent

Hah, this is da bomb. Most couples which practice this way of life will find themselves in an everlasting relationship. This fart, my friends has built its reputation as the stink bomb over the years. No one usually realizes its presence at first, but as time goes by, the intense odor finds its way into your nostrils, refusing to budge, demanding for its existence to be noticed. Likewise, couples like this could be hastily branded as the unromantic kind but lo and behold, they are the ones who end up getting married and popping out babies together 20 years later. 

3) The Nothing

This category serves for those with no gas trouble and no relationships. In other words, forever alone like me.*diezz*